Song of the day! Style of the day! Picture of the day!

Song of the day

This the song of the day! Yay! I finally have something up after a 6-day delay relating to recovery. Well this song is called Crystal Spider and is by the Band sweet water who was a popular band from 1969. The band performed at Woodstock, everything was going good until one night they were out celebrating and got high and got into a car accident and the lead singer  got her vocal chords crushed, and was told she couldn't sing anymore. She tried singing again but her voice just wasn't the same.

I think this song is about a girl who lost her boyfriend and wants him back. I'm taking that from the part of the song that goes, "Have you seen my crystal spider? He has eyes of mercury. He has left his web of paisley. If you seen, will you please bring him back to me?" I think he spider is the guy she lost and she wants him back, simple as that, okay maybe not that simple but you get the idea.

Style of the day

Today's style is actually two different outfits. They are both by Chanel. These two exquisite and awesome designs debuted at Fashion Week 2012. I absolutely love the shirt/dress on the right, I love the almost tribal pattern vibe, that has Aviator glasses, and total fashion awesomeness that tops off the outfit. I adore the whole outfit on the right. Everything is so well together, whoever was the one who put the Chanel designs together deserves praise. 

Picture of the day

This is sere gorgeousness! The beautiful pinks compliment the light blonde and caucasion skin of this model. I think this picture is a fairy. I think this is a garden fairy who lives carefree and is defiantly other worldly in an amazing way.

Song of the day. Fashion of the day. Bad news on recovery.

This music is one of my all time fav's. I love the concept in this video of a girl who was dumped and hopelessly misses her boyfriend and is crying, but she expresses herself and lets everything go in the end. This song is kinda my theme song, crazy I know.

This is the fashion of the day. I love leather just as much as the next girl(or guy) And so of course I adore this exquisitely put together outfit. I admire the fact that whoever put this outfit together could have just put on a black tee-shirt, But instead they threw in a shirt that is  bursting with color. I of course want to also steal the shoes out of this picture.

This is the state I am currently at. I weigh around 75-80 I started to gain weight but over the past three days I have begone to descale in my battle with my disease. I have made progress up until this point, now You can only see the outline of my bones. I'm trying I really am but this is my fourth time getting help. The other three times I only went to the hospital and got healthy and got no help, so In about a week I would loose that weight all over again. Anorexia as you can see is not an attractive thing, no one wants to look like a skeleton. In my opinion I'm not to skinny, but In other people's I am. I love how I look, but I know that I have to eat to stay healthy, but sometimes eating just is to much, sometimes I can not drink a whole cup of tea because I get sick and start to throw up. Anorexia is a battle that goes up-an-down for me. But my Bulimia is getting better, now I don't through all of my food up, and I am getting to the point of resisting the urge. I'm not quit recovered but I will get there.  

Song time! And update on recovery/help with anyone's problems

Branches scrape my window again.
The moon is the only light I see.
Bloody hearts lay at your feet.
You could have saved them,
but you let them bleed.
(chorus)
Is knowing better?
Or is staying ignorant right?
Is anyone gonna help me?
Help me put up a fight?
Why do you yell?
Why does wherever you step end in tragedy?
So just leave me alone?
Walk through the door,
set my heart free!
Oh goin, going, gone.

(next part)
Shadows are all I see.
Pain is all I know.
Tragedy is addicted to me.
When it comes to you even the devil weeps.
When you left me I was strong,
I didn't even cry!
(chorus)

Is knowing better?
Or is staying ignorant right?
Is anyone gonna help me?
Help me put up a fight?
Why do you yell?
Why does wherever you step end in tragedy?
So just leave me alone?
Walk through the door,
set my heart free!
Oh goin, going, gone.

(next part)
You destroy the crossroads of peoples lives.
You make me wish love was true.
You make me wonder.
You always say, that sticks and stones will break my bones, but words will break my will to survive, no matter how much I try to stay alive.
Why do the good die young?
Instead of helping me, your only killing me.
(final chorus)

Is knowing better?
Or is staying ignorant right?
Is anyone gonna help me?
Help me put up a fight?
Why do you yell?
Why does wherever you step end in tragedy?
So just leave me alone?
Walk through the door,
set my heart free!
Oh goin, going, gone.
(Last/final part)
I guess staying ignorant was better.
I guess your only mostly full of tragedies
Who am I foolin I cried.
When you were goin, going, gone.
Thanks for reading, recording up soon if time permits.
And to anyone wondering treatment is going awesomely I am now up to 80 pounds! Which is a big improvement from 68 pounds. If you have any stories/questions/ need to talk just comment below.
          


And here is the picture of the day and yesterday's:

In this picture I imagine that this girl lives in the 12th century and lives a busy life, and the only time she can find piece of mind is when she losses herself in music.

I think this girl would be a princess from a kingdom at war. She is in despair and crying because her love was killed in the war of her kingdom and his. Meaning that there love was forbidden.

Picture of the day! :), and Poetry time

This is the picture of the day. To me all of the colors mean happiness and lightheartedness. The one who made this could be reflecting on a girl who they could have been in love with and to express there feelings they painted this.

Poetry Time!

Life goes on    by, Me :)

When you think life is over,
Go on to the next day.
When you think you cannot go on anymore,
Pick a flower,
and breath in its aroma of happiness.
When the flowers scent goes away,
Go to the sea,
And look at the waves crash on the rocks
When the waves stop crashing,
lay down in the sand,
And remember
Life Goes On.

First song: Ugly Beautiful World

Leaves fall from the sky.
As the sun rays hit your eyes, and make them shine.
Will the yelling ever stop?
You are my first love.
Why is the world to cruel?
As you walk through the door.
          (chorus)
Because I've loved I have grown.
Because I've loved I have found peace.
In this ugly beautiful world.
Because I've loved I have lived.
Because I've loved I have seen hope.
In this ugly beautiful world.
That is why I sing.
        (piano)
        (second part/verse)
Rose petals fall where you walk.
Birds sing of your journey.
Stars diminish in comparison to you.
Why is the world so cruel?
As you walk through the door.
         (last chorus)
Because I've loved I have grown.
Because I've loved I have found peace.
In this ugly beautiful world.
Because I've loved I have lived.
Because I've love I have seen hope.
In this ugly beautiful world.
That is why I sing
Oh.......!
Because I've loved I've grown.
Because I've loved I've found.
Because I've loved I've lived.
Because I've loved I've grown.
In this ugly beautiful world.
That is why I sing.
     (last little part after a lot of piano)
(in high voice)
Let all the crying stop.
The cuts run to deep.
And close your eyes.
And breath.
That is why I sing.
Goodbye.
i hope you liked it, leave comments and tell me what you think, in about a week or so the actual recording will be put up, hope you like it!

Introduction to me, so you know a little about who your reading the opinions of

 Well were I start? I am an orphan. My parents died in a car accident not to long ago about five months ago to be exact. Life was hard but my brother and I have pulled through. I was one of those troubled teenagers after my parents died. I tried being emo, smoking, drinking you name it I did it. But one day while I was walking home from my less than ideal school I found a beat up old guitar in dumpster. Until I found that guitar I had no way of expressing my feeling I was just some bottled up person. I then took the guitar home, and taught myself how to play. It took a while there was a lot of  bang-your-head-against-the-wall-moments, and a lot of blooding fingers before my calluses formed. But once I started writing my music everything felt better, I was happier and not as sad. My music gave me a way to let everything go and to not look back. My music expresses my feelings so it could jump from a ballad, to despair, to tragedy, to happy, to well anything. In a little bit once I can I'm going to start recording my music and putting it up here so you can actually listen to it instead of just reading the lyrics.
  But music isn't the only way I express myself, I also paint. To me the arts of music and well art of course are the only ways I can express myself. I was lost, nothing was right. When I paint I leave the world and go into a different place where I express myself with colors. Sometimes my paintings come out looking like a blank canvas because I was a blank person. Or they could come out in spontaneous combustion's of physcotic fusions worth of color.
  I am also a writer I books. So far my only book is Angelic Blood which is a book about a girl who was adopted and her birth parents well I'll just say that one of them is a Demon one is an Angel. And the apocalypse is coming, and her and her two friends Yui, and Koda have to fight the band of dark/fallen angels. But there is a twist not all of the fallen angels and demons are bad, some might even be more good than any of Gods angels.
  I also write poems, my poems end up being about the world and why people don't accept others. The little quote/poem on my page called "A Flower" that is an original by me.
  And well lastly I am somewhat of a model, I have modeled before but I had to stop because even though I wasn't big, being 6"2 and 112 pounds the agencies told me I was to fat so this caused me to become anorexic and Bulimic. Just about 2 weeks ago I was 68 pounds. I am currently in a anorexia/bulimia hospital. I will be out in about a little more than three weeks. I will also maybe be updating that.
  Well this is me flaws and all it's all in here. I hope you enjoyed reading. Comment and tell me if  you want me to put the first couple chapters of my book up or anymore of my poems, or if you want me to put an update thing of recovery.
   Well I leave you with the picture of the day:

This picture I think means, a new beginning. The storms represent the past, some clouds are light reflecting everything good, and the bad clouds reflecting everything horrid in the past. The bike is pretty much moving forward and flowers show that the road ahead will be beautiful.

Welcome to my blog

Welcome to my blog, on this blog I will post my songs. My songs are about my struggles, tragedies, and pains. Everyday I will put up a picture and tell my impression of it. Every other day a song of mine will be put up.Tomorrow will be the first day (1/17/12) I hope you enjoy my blog.
 Also to know who I ma and what I have been through read my song lyrics and you will know.